Bridal Shower

Klautermauffen

F-f-f-f-f-f-f-founderrr
Founder
Mar 11, 2008
3,846
26
68
32
Seattle
Okay... I've never been to one of these things... what the hell do I bring?

I know there will be eskimo bingo, so I'll bring random cutesy stuff for that.. but for the bride ... ??? Are we supposed to bring anything for the groom? If not, is it offensive to get a joint gift that's for both of them?


 

Polar Bear

ppbbtt! -excuse me.
Founder
Mar 5, 2008
1,009
15
68
45
I thought 'eskimo' was found to be a derogatory slang word?

Trying to be politically correct in this country is harder than keeping up with ever-changing fucking fashion trends anymore.

Oh and on topic: No, if the bride and groom smoke weed, a joint is a fine gift.
 

Klautermauffen

F-f-f-f-f-f-f-founderrr
Founder
Mar 11, 2008
3,846
26
68
32
Seattle
I thought 'eskimo' was found to be a derogatory slang word?

Trying to be politically correct in this country is harder than keeping up with ever-changing fucking fashion trends anymore.

Oh and on topic: No, if the bride and groom smoke weed, a joint is a fine gift.
"Eskimo" is only offensive if you use it like most american hicks use "chinese"

I wers pickin' me up some smokes when this'n chEIneez feller ... etc, etc...

Eskimo is an actual tribe of people - their name just happened to become more well-known than say... Aleut.

When people say, "Oh yeah, that's right... YOU'RE ESKIMO!" that's when I want to lop their head off.

It's like telling a Japanese woman that she's Chinese no matter how many times she politely tells you otherwise.

btw - my husband does that. :yociexp34:

annnnnnyways... they don't smoke weed. They're civil christian folk...
 

Negativecool

Gold Member
Founder
May 30, 2008
2,359
43
78
39
Internet
They're civil christian folk...
In that case, I would go with the double ended dildo so they can participate in their mad lesbian group sex fetish fantasies.

You think they haven't thought about doing it? Bullshit, they'll do it now that they have their double ended dildo!
 

SlimSkeeter

Guest
Why stop at double ended? Find that uber-vibrator with the multiple heads from Euro Trip. It will be a night they never forget.
 

Violet

Yaa!
Founder
Feb 28, 2014
765
9
18
Hmm.. Aren't bridal showers like the chick version of bachelor parties?

I thought you were supposed to get the bride all liquored up and make her eat penis-pops.



Buy her sexy lingerie and toys. (That's kind of a gift for him and her, right?) You know, the kind of stuff you can't buy them for wedding gifts.

Unless her grandma is going to be there. That could be awkward.






Then again.. my grandma would probably enjoy that kind of party.
 

Mamba

Uranium
Founder
May 22, 2008
2,288
1
66
Buy her a day at a spa with massage etc. Those kind of gifts really mean you care.

I really want a day at a spa.
 

SlimSkeeter

Guest
My niece went to one recently...they went bar-hopping and had a scavenger hunt. Had to find a guy wearing a thong, dance with 2 guys at once, had to get underwear from another guy...random shit like that. End of the night they had to pour the bride-to-be into bed with a bucket next to her head.
 

Klautermauffen

F-f-f-f-f-f-f-founderrr
Founder
Mar 11, 2008
3,846
26
68
32
Seattle
My spa idea = win.
Indeed. I'll be looking into that this weekend :D

My niece went to one recently...they went bar-hopping and had a scavenger hunt. Had to find a guy wearing a thong, dance with 2 guys at once, had to get underwear from another guy...random shit like that. End of the night they had to pour the bride-to-be into bed with a bucket next to her head.
Mmm... yeah... Did I mention they're nice, judgmental Christian folk? Good people - zero sense of humor.

Damn right they better .... my wiener's nickname is "hip breaker".

( And that's not just because I like to bang a GILF on occasion. )
Dude. No. Anyone old enough to be your Grand-anything should be in a coffin.
 

SlimSkeeter

Guest
Mmm... yeah... Did I mention they're nice, judgmental Christian folk? Good people - zero sense of humor.
Come to think of it, you did drop the C-bomb up there, didn't you? My niece is a recovering Catholic. Not the same thing. Perhaps those cute towels that say "His" and "Hers"?
 

Klautermauffen

F-f-f-f-f-f-f-founderrr
Founder
Mar 11, 2008
3,846
26
68
32
Seattle
Come to think of it, you did drop the C-bomb up there, didn't you? My niece is a recovering Catholic. Not the same thing. Perhaps those cute towels that say "His" and "Hers"?
I'm gonna see how much that whole spa idea is and if that doesn't work out, I'm going with engraved kitchen shit.

I really hate stuff like this. I'm not sweet and overly feminine (tittering at the "p" word)... so I usually don't have any fun. Their idea of fun is to giggle about the "things we don't talk about" ... Me and my friends talk about pretty. much. everything. So, what they're giggling about was last night's dinner conversation at my house. Ugh, and the group prayer shit has just got to go. Yeah, I get it, you're religious... but does the whole room REALLY have to bow their heads so you can thank god for all your blessings??

Rar! The closer I get to having to go to this thing, the more I'm just dreading it. I think I might just drop off her present a day early and be like "I have a geino appointment. Sorry, can't go."