How to save a fortune on catfood

lowkey

Homeless guy
Jan 15, 2011
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Dallas, Texas
In the interest of pleasing my "Master," he whom I serve, IE: The Evil Siamese Bastard, AKA "The Cat." I recently did a study on cat food.

The results indicated from least to best. Dry food, not so much. Canned wet food, better, but not great. Home made wet food, much better. And live Mice or Birds, best of all.

Well, he's cranky on dry food, but it keeps him alive. Canned wet food is okay, but it means I have to work on a regular basis. Home made wet food is a lot of work, and if I am going to pay people food prices to make it, I'd have to get a job for that one.

Then there's the live food option. Very attractive for many reason, and potentially the cheapest of all with a little work and some birdseed. The thing about bird feed is it's cheap, and birds are stupid.

So what you do is you scatter birdseed in the backyard every afternoon for about a week. By then you should have a daily flock, eating and chirping up a storm. By chirping I mean hollering in Bird Talk, "Hey Everybody, Free Food."

When that happens you set the cellphone in the middle of it all, to record the happy bird noises, as they feed. During that week you build an attached bird house, to the outside of the house, backed up to the sliding glass window. Make sure the holes in it are big enough to let birds in, and keep squirrels out.

You alos need a couple of speakers, some small outside food and water trays, and inside you scatter lots of birdseed, and have several water dishes. Next, you start playing the bird feeding sound clip on a looped basis all day long.

Within a week, you'll have birds in it all day, feeding away, and at night, there'll be mice roaming around, eating the bird seed too.


At that point, whenever the cats hungry, day or night, just open the sliding glass window for him, and it's feeding time.

All for the price of birdseed.
 

Wenis

Hello Ladies.
Feb 18, 2009
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I have to agree, if it wasn't for my extravagance when it comes to cat food, I could be a millionaire right now!

What about the "speakers running all day long"? my electricity bill (which I don't have to pay because I'm a free loading student) will outweigh the cost of some Felix.

Also you have the problem where whenever the cat is anywhere it's been conditioned to kill birds and mice; so it will, and your house will be full of dragged in carcasses.
 

Toao

Family
Nov 19, 2010
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You have cats Wenis? What a surprise. Do you by any chance know any show tunes?