Time off work = driving me mad


Trunk Monkey
Jul 1, 2008
Sydney, Australia
Valentine's Day was my little sister's wedding.

I applied for just 1 week of my 4 weeks of annual leave last year in advance, knowing her wedding was coming up. I've taken this week off partially to recover from the open bar at her reception and partially so I can look after their pets while they're overseas.

Big mistake.

I've never been so bored in my life. Never.

To make matters even more interesting, my work bonus arrived into my bank account last week.

So here's a brief list of how I've spent the better part of the last week:

  • Spent $240 on weekly groceries, making sure to include plenty of spices and spicy meats in the purchase. The cat's bowels have been punished as a result of her persistant meow-ing and scratching at my door in the mornings at 3am.

  • Borrowed my girlfriend's easel and paints, and began working on a nude self-portrait. The canvas is roughly 5 feet by 3 feet and I will be sure to post a photograph of it when it is finished.

  • Purchased, played and completed Fallout 3 on PS3. In 2 days.

  • Bought takeaway every weeknight this week, sat in front of my 42" plasma and gourged on fast food whilst watching The Biggest Loser. I'm doing it right now, in fact.

  • Was so bored yesterday, I jerked off to pass the time. To make it more amusing, I blew my load into the back of one of our fans. My manjuice was, subsequently, sprayed all over the living room carpet. I didn't vaccuum afterwards.

  • Stalked someone. I followed them, in car, from my suburb all the way to Manly before they pulled into their driveway. When I say I followed them, I mean staying within 1 car length the whole time through the streets of Sydney up to the northern beaches. I then considered paying a visit to The Biggest Loser house whilst up there, but couldn't find a KFC restaurant to tease the fatties with.

The list could go on for a few more paragraphs, but you get the drift.

I recently also became an active public methane producer. I've been embarrassing my girlfriend so much by letting off a SBD (silent but deadly) farts in shopping centres then asking the nearest person "do you smell smoke?", knowing they would definitely take a sniff as a reaction to such a question.


What crazy shenanigans do you get up to when you're bored?


I has title
Mar 20, 2008
I recently also became an active public methane producer. I've been embarrassing my girlfriend so much by letting off a SBD (silent but deadly) farts in shopping centres then asking the nearest person "do you smell smoke?", knowing they would definitely take a sniff as a reaction to such a question.

That's fantastic!

When I'm bored I usually take nude photos, write shitty poems, masturbate or play poker. Sometimes I do some of those at the same time.
It's amazing how flaccid I get when I lose with an AA.


Dec 10, 2008
I usually end up doing manic things when I am bored such as trimming my bushes with a cleaver or changing out my own brakes ( A learn as you go experience for me). I start things and then don't finish them such as DIY projects. I tiled an island a while back and have yet to apply the stain to the base. I also get the urge to clean when I am bored. I do this by throwing everything away which keeps my cabinets and closets empty. I have been living in my house for 5 years and my house is still pretty much bare. I tend to regret throwing most of the stuff away but if it's not used for a little while, out it goes.

I also read, write, play on the computer, or paint things such as bird houses and furniture when I am bored.


Mar 11, 2008
Oh man.... there isn't much I don't do when I'm bored, but here's a list of some stuff off the top of my head

-dye my hair strange colors
-put outrageous make-up on
-over organize stuff
-weird stuff that I really don't think I want to tell you guys
-color (yes, like kiddy coloring book)
-read anything I can get my hands on.... this sometimes turns into reading every label in the entire kitchen and/or bathroom
-throwing stuff away. I HATE packaging. With a passion. So... sometimes I'll just go through and reduce bulk as much as possible.
-bake interesting concoctions of yumminess
-squeeze blackheads
-go for a walk


Mao's Pet Cat
Mar 2, 2008
Hong Kong, hiding from the Kommies!
PC/PS3 gaming.

Talk walks in the outdoor markets, checking people out and eating a snack from the outdoor food stalls (no, not cat or dog).

TV watching like House, old X-file, CSI: Miami

But seriously, too much time spent on gaming.


Crimson Kunoichi
Mar 11, 2008
Seattle, WA
Ha! i swear to god you sound like me...i do crazy shit when I'm bored.

I have also started on a nude self portrait, i was trying to make me do that Al Bundy football pose but i really do suck at painting hands so it kinda looked like i had oven mitts on.

Anyhoo, i like to test my flexibility when I'm bored so I'll tie my hands behind my back so i can practice popping my shoulders out of socket to get free. The only problem with that is if you don't have anyone there to untie you, you might get trapped on the floor weeping softly in a awkward position until someone comes home.

I also work out like a motherfucker, even on my days off when i'm not supposed to be working out i'll still spaz around the house just to burn up some energy.

I like to memorize things too, like movies, dances and songs mostly, i'm in the process of relearning the thriller dance because for the life of me i can't do the groovy head slide thing right anymore.

I'm still trying to train my dogs to 'sick balls'...

And right now i'm practicing marvel vs capcom so i'll be able to maintain my rule over my fella..he thinks he can keep ruleing me with Iceman, but i'm pretty pimp with Venom and i just learned the near impossable move by Zangief so he's going to end up choking on my awesomeness when he gets home. =)

Yeah, don't waste your time unless you are learning something either amusing or useful, thats my motto.